I'm so horribly sad...?

6 years ago I moved over 1000 miles from my close family and friends to help support my husband's desire to expand his career. We had 2 children and now 3. I loved my life b/4 we moved. It wasn't perfect, but I really did love it and my husband was happy, too. He was buddies with my brothers and BILs...we all had children who played together, I had a great time with my sister and SILs. After moving here, my husband's childless and hardly child-friendly family moved here. They do not enjoy my children and there aren't any cousins. My SILs do not invite me or involve me in anything. I tried in the beginning to invite them over, but nothing ever caught on. My in-laws keep me on the edge of the family, even having me sit at the children's table at holiday dinners. I don't even bother to go much anymore. My husband has sibling lunches with his sisters and various meals with his parents. He discovered old college frat brothers here and hangs out wtih them, plays BB, etc. He travels often for his work and is great friends with many co-workers, attending happy hour with them here and there. I used to have a good career in acting and musical theatre. The dry climate here has damaged my throat so that I am now horribly limited...I've only worked twice since the move. I've joined mother clubs, spiritual organizations, volunteered at my children's school, etc., etc. and for some reason, I've not made a single friend. I'm so tired of trying. Sometimes I feel like I want to die b/c I'm so lonely. I can tell my husband resents this...and I don't blame him. He has the perfect life other than me, quite honestly. It's like I am no longer a person at all...just a tool for the use of my children and my husband. He promised me if after a year of living here we would move back if we weren't happy...well, he got happy and I feel so horribly depressed that it's barely tolerable. My family and friends are so far away now I have barely seen them...it's like we are divided now. The time difference makes it hard to get to talk on the phone. I miss living near them so much...so, so much. I hate that my children don't even know them anymore and that their children barely know me. I don't even feel like my husband loves me at all anymore. How can a spouse watch another suffer so much and only get mad? Sometimes I wonder what I've done wrong... I have a roof over my head, food for my children, clothing...but I don't feel gratitude. Living with my husband is like eating saltines while he's eating steak and lecturing me to be grateful for what I have. I'm so sad...